Forget the Roaring Twenties, the Dirty Thirties or the Nifty Fifties – today I want to talk about the NAUGHTY FORTIES. But what are the naughty forties? And why is everyone talking about them?
The Naughty Forties is a notable decade for many women. Middle age is often a time when women feel hornier, sexier and more confident in themselves. Sadly, women in this age group are frequently stigmatised because of inaccurate stereotypes that frame them as less sexual, less beautiful and less sprightly than their younger counterparts. Fortunately, nothing could be further from the truth— – just ask a 40-something-year-old woman like me.
I’m 45 years young and my libido is skyrocketing. SKYROCKETING!! The only time I don’t think about sex is when I’m eating, drinking, shopping or sleeping. My never-ending horniness can feel exhausting at times and my constant need for sexual release can feel like an amusement park ride that I’m unable to get off.
The Naughty Forties have given me compassion for horny young men travelling through their sexual peak whereas once upon a time, I would have judged them harshly.
Raging hormones, (or whoremoans) as I like to call them, take over our thoughts, time and life. Sometimes we feel like we are out of control. But what causes this lustful ‘moment’ in time?
I’m going to enthusiastically explore six key things every person needs to know about the Naughty Forties.
HORNY AS HELL
Forget sexually obsessed young men! Women in their 40’s can give these spring chickens a run for their money. A popular study conducted by Texan psychologists, Dr. Judith Easton and Dr. David Buss reveals that women sandwiched between peak fertility and perimenopause are the horniest of the lot.
According to their research, middle aged women are less fertile than women in their twenties, which suggests they need to be more promiscuous for procreation to occur.
Basically, this perpetual lusting which I am currently experiencing – is my body’s last hurrah to get itself knocked up!
THE CONFIDENCE GLOW
There is definitely a “confidence” that emerges during a woman’s fourth decade and much of it is to do with life experience. Many women have enjoyed diverse careers whilst also journeying through childbirths, marriage, divorce and caring for elderly parents. Those of us who are single and childless have earned our ‘glow’ from battling societal judgement that comes with such a life status.
Hollywood actress, Cameron Diaz told InStyle magazine that The Naughty Forties has been her BEST decade yet:
“You know, I think the 40s are the best decade, you just get to be real with yourself, and you can also make necessary changes because you have the experience of looking back on four decades. Looking at patterns and seeing what things really work. You get to let go of giving a shit about anything. You’re done! Don’t care. I really don’t. It’s such a relief.”
According to research conducted on gender differences, women are conditioned from birth to place value on how they look over how they feel.
They are inundated with photoshopped images of perfect bodies and faces, which make them constantly question; “Am I enough?” Am I thin enough? Tanned enough? Pretty enough? Bootylicious enough? Shagable enough?
From our teens to our thirties, we find ourselves in a ceaseless battle to attain perfection yet never reach it because it doesn’t exist. The 40’s seem to provide some respite for women. With our uninvited crows feet and those grey ‘silver linings’ showing up in our hair, we adopt a no BS attitude to deal with ageing.
IT’S NOT AS BAD AS YOU THINK IT WILL BE
When I was in my twenties I thought people who were in their 40s were ancient – like REALLY ancient. I considered it a time of failed dreams, invisibility and saggy tits. I mean these people were old and surely their life was over, right?
It was a shock to the system when I arrived at the BIG 4-OH only five years ago. I still received the same amount of attention from men (if not more). I still had so many plans and goals and dreams. And finally – my body was fine. It wasn’t the burnt down building I had envisioned – actually it wasn’t too dissimilar from previous decades.
Ageism is pervasive and creates fear in all of us, but no birthday is ever as bad as we think, it’s a privilege because our only other option is death.
Earlier in this blog post, I spoke about promiscuous 40-somethings and their newly-found sexual liberation. And what a wonderful coincidence this should coincide with women choosing to have children later in life.
My late mother fell pregnant with me in her mid-forties after birthing four sons. And now I’m around the same age and hoping to follow suit with a middle-aged pregnancy.
For all the madness that is going on in the world right now, how life-affirming is it that women have feasible options in 2022?
We no longer have to make the choice between one or the other. We now find ourselves in a privileged situation where we can have it all. We are supported, we are educated, and we can make it work.
THE NAUGHTY FORTIES ISN’T A DECADE TO FEAR
The Naughty Forties is not a decade to approach with shame or hesitation. It is a decade to march towards triumphantly. 40-something women are lustful, experienced, brave and free.
It’s a decade to celebrate. Anyone got a bottle of champagne?