Nothing to do on the weekend? Thought about being a weekend super-hero?
First point of call, get your Mum to make you a super-hero costume. All you need is a cape, a mask and some cushions for muscles.
If that fails, head off to your local costume shop.
Most importantly, to become a weekend super-hero you will need to get yourself an identity and some secret super-hero powers.
If you’re stuck creating your super-hero identity, may I suggest copious amounts of alcohol on Friday night (only for people OVER 18 years of age). It will give you courage, bravery (and integrity?)
Some local hotspots in your area that may require your super-hero services are 711 or McDonalds.
If you’re having trouble creating your super-hero powers, I recommend ESP. This keeps a nice safe distance between you and the perpetrators.
Another option is having your local police station phone number on speed dial.
The most rewarding attribute of being a weekend super-hero is the satisfaction one feels in themselves doing good deeds in the community, without the adulation.
Check out Brisbane’s most famous superhero Captain Australia talk about his beat in this YouTube clip.
Hang on. Incoming call.
“What’s that? Trouble at 711? Four hoods in a car? My specialty!”
Anyway, must go. The work of a weekend super-hero is never done.
See you all out on the beat.